1. If your parent wants to put you down, turn your legs to jello as soon as they touch the floor. If that doesn’t work, latch onto their leg like a koala hugging a tree.

  2. If you find out someone’s about to drop by your your house and there is a mad flurry of straightening before they come, make sure you tell your visitors in detail what happened before they arrived. Also point out what there wasn’t time to do and/or detail exactly what dishes were shoved in the oven.

  3. If your Barbies are possessed, DO NOT tell your parents until the Barbies do bad things and you get in trouble.

  4. here’s one my sister, [she’s 5] follows. if you are asked to take the trash out, start dancing for 3 hours, then fall to the floor. get up and dance until you parents give up and take the trash out.

    note- she dose the same thing anytime she’s asked to do a chore

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